A Spanish-French adventure

This week we returned from probably the best holiday we've had in years. My brother got married just outside Girona and we took the opportunity to make the most of it and have a 2 week Spanish break.

Thanks to my fear of flying (and not being able to pop valium or get wasted on vodka as I would have in times gone by) we booked a ferry to France, 3 stops on the way down and prepared ourselves for a 4-day adventure with 2 under-5s.

I was apprehensive about the car travel and wondered how the boys would be but I prepared activity packs for them, plenty of snacks and drinks and an iPad loaded up with Peppa Pig and they were fine. They slept ALOT in the car which was great for the journey itself but my God did we pay for it in the evenings when they became incredible non-sleeping children.

We stopped in Tours, Sarlat-La-Caneda and Carcasonne on the way down. We then crossed the border and drove to the wedding venue in Fares and from there spent a week in Crespia. We only had 2 days to travel back up so 2 looooong days of driving took us to Limoges and finally Caen to get our ferry early morning.

We stayed in some beautiful places. Notably Les Petites Chamilles, just outside Sarlat, run by the parents of a friend I met through Twitter, L'Arcada which hosted the wedding and Hostal Nou where we spent the largest chunk after the celebrations.

The wedding was incredible, a 4-day celebration surrounded by friends and family. My parents are divorced and, though amiable, it's not often I get to see them both in one place so to have them, my brother plus my aunties, uncles, cousins and step-siblings not just together in one place but all dancing, laughing and enjoying each other's company was something special indeed.

All 3 places were located 'off the beaten track' and run by the most friendly, welcoming hosts we could have hoped for. Hostal Nou is owned by a Catalan family. As well as her day job as a teacher, Elena cooks the most amazing meals for the guests in the evening (saying they're 'amazing' actually doesn't do her justice. She went to cooking school for 2 years and the standard was unlike anything we've had for a very long time) runs the business with her husband and looks after her boys, age 2 and 5. The word 'superwoman' doesn't cut it for this lady!

The boys fell into a routine of waking at 9 (heaven after years of 5:30 starts!) having a siesta in the afternoon, eating with us at 9 then going to bed at 11. It worked really well and what struck me most about both France and Spain is the inclusion of children in everything. Going out of an evening, familes are all out together and it's perfectly acceptable to have toddlers at the table in restaurants at 9/10pm. They were given much attention everywhere we went with a pat on the head and a 'guapo' welcoming them in.

I won't drone on any more about the holiday itself, just to say that we had an amazing first proper family holiday. Lots of fun in the pool, taking in some beautiful parts of the country, immersing ourselves in the culture and eating some fabulous Catalan cuisine.

A (fake) 3rd birthday

Because we were travelling on Max's actual 3rd birthday yesterday (I can't imagine being stuck in a car for 8 hours is much fun on your birthday. Or any other day for that matter) he had a fake birthday whilst we were still in Spain and my Mum was there.

I had a few birthdays on holiday when I was little and remember it being more special than a dreary English birthday so we packed a load of pressies and made a right old fuss of my favourite 3-year-old. Who was actually still 2 but hey, like he knew.

The owner of our B&B is a chef and we had our evening meals there each night. She made a massive chocolate cake especially for Max and the highight of the day (his and mine - for different reasons) was all the other guests gathering round our table as the cake was bought out and singing happy birthday in variations of broken English and then one of the Belgian teenagers bringing him a card she'd made. Very special indeed. I even managed not to cry.

Oh, Brother

Brothers are funny creatures. Especially big brothers. In my experience big brothers fart on your head, make fun of you in front of your friends and blame you for their wrongdoings in front of your parents.

Then you grow up. Since the ages of 17 and 18 my brother and I have lived apart and actually have only spent about 4 years since in the same country. We're now 33 and 34 and other than my parents he remains the one constant in my life since birth. He is the the one I shared my secrets, my childhood with and in many ways, knows me better than any other. We have a bond that I'll have with no other for as long as I shall live.

What I love most about my brother is how, though we see each other barely 3 times a year he never changes. As though no time has passed, we revert to teenagers, making up songs and laughing at our poor Dad's expense as yet another practical joke is played on him, followed by much eye-rolling from the rest of the family.

He got married this weekend. Sometimes, especially when someone's always been there, we don't stop to think what it is that makes them special. What I guess I've always known and loved about my brother was apparent in the best man's speech. Far from regaling the guests with drunken escapades and tales of girlfriends past, one of my brother's best men gave a heartfelt speech on a true friendship they've shared since becoming roommates at uni years ago.

One of his lines was that nobody has a bad word to say about my brother. I've never thought about it before this week but it's totally true. He has time for anyone, will do anything for anybody and has a pure heart which sees only the good in people. He's the best friend you could ask for, an amazing Dad and now, a husband who I know will look after his wife as he's looked after us in his own unique way all these years.

His own speech further confirmed this. His new wife is Spanish and he took the time to deliver his speech half in English (as James) and half in Spanish as Sombrero James complete with 'traditional dress' (his words) of a giant hat (they took the sarcasm in good humour, thankfully). He spoke about how each person in your life touches you in a way and shapes you into the person you are today and thanked my parents and myself for each of our roles in making him him.

He and his wife have never said 'I love you' to each other. As he says, you demonstrate your love for a person through actions not words and as such they feel what they do for each other is more significant than those  words which are all to easily uttered. He went on to make one final statement which was to have the male guests line up and place all manner of ridiculous paraphernalia upon his new bride, each with a special meaning, a little but of their history, to the soundtrack of 'Baby I Love You' by the Ramones. The single most touching moment of the day.

There were many tears shed that day. Most of joy, some of sadness for those lost who couldn't be there but in my case, of pride. I love my brother, was proud to stand by his side, proud to be his sister and privileged to have shared my life with him. He is without doubt the coolest person I know. Besides, who else would walk down the aisle to the ET theme and take their first dance to 'Earth Angel' from Back to the Future?

Mars Bar biscuit cake

After a run of posts on health and fitness I feel I need to redress the balance and add some sugar to the blog. I had a recipe in an Asda magazine yonks ago for a refrigerator cake which I'd made and loved.

I've since lost the magazine but thought I'd try to recreate it this afternoon. It's deliciously decadent and not for the faint hearted (or dieter, diabetic or those on a budget for that matter) but y'know, sometimes when it's cold, rainy and the kids need entertaining so you just have to chuck out the rule book.

You will need:

3 Mars Bars, chopped into small pieces
80g Butter
6 Digestive biscuits, crushed
Bag of Malteasers (I had a big bag but only used half in the cake. The rest went in my tummy)
40g Raisins
Large bar Galaxy

1. Melt the Mars Bars and butter in a bowl over a pan of simmering water, stirring frequently (mine curdled when they melted, I just removed them from the heat and whisked rapidly until they combined and it was fine)

 

2. Add the remaining ingredients to the melted chocolate and stir well

3. Pour the mixture in a suitable dish and spread evenly until about 1cm thick

4. Pop in the fridge for 3-4 hours until set

5. Melt the Galaxy in a bowl over a pan of simmering water

6. Pour over the now-set biscuit cake

5. Devour heavily, guilt-free. Cos sometimes you've just gotta.

Back in the (running) game

I have a colourful history with running. I ran the Bath Half Marathon last year which was my first foray into distance running. Or any running for that matter, I HATED it before that.

After that I went right off it. I didn't run at all for about 6 months, I think the feeling of 'having' to run and the commitment to training had taken the fun out of running (that's not right, is it? Is running ever 'fun'?)

So anyways, with the bikini looming, I've gotten back into it and started running on the treadmill at the gym over the winter and have progressed to running outdoors again which feels great. Treadmills are all well and good - especially when it's cold, wet and windy which we know all too well at the moment - but I personally prefer running outside. The boredom factor isn't there (as much) and it burns more calories. Plus, because I'm not fixated on a control panel, I find I'm actually faster outside.

So I've entered the Great South Run. A 10-mile stretch across the south coast in October. Hopefully it'll keep me running after the holiday and get me training again with my buddy I did the half with. It's SO much easier when I have someone to gossip train with.

So training is GO. I'm even taking my running gear on holiday with me (though I can't guarantee I'll use it) Have any of you done the GSR? I'd love to hear your experiences.

Our favourite children's books

If there's one thing my children have inherited from me, besides freckles, a sweet tooth and a quick temper (yep, it's brilliant when we clash) is a love of books. Finn especially can sit for hours absorbing the story through the pictures. It never fails to amaze me how he can perfectly recite a story after only 3 or 4 nights of me reading it. Clearly he's not inherited my memory.

5 Days old. Max's first book (quite a read)

We have a bedtime ritual which involves a bath, milk and 3 stories. As I have mentioned before I never buy toys (our families' generosity sees that we don't have to!) but my rule doesn't apply to books, I could buy them until the cows come home. Or I run out of money. I love our snuggly evenings, kids hanging on to my every word as I read.

There is a steam railway a small walk from our house and one day a lady was coming out of the gift shop with a distraught 3-year-old. The girl clearly had been told she couldn't have something from the shop and her Mum snapped 'I'm not buying you a book, you have one at home. Let's go and get some sweets instead'. One of the saddest things I've overheard a parent say.

Our library has a great children's section and every few weeks we return home with our little Bookstart bag bursting from the seams. I love these 'new book' days and so enjoy seeing the boys' anticipation at going to bed with a brand new story to experience. The same feeling I get starting a new book. It's magical.

So over the past 4 years, I've read alot of children's books and this, dear readers, is our pick of the best (in no particular order)

1. Zog by Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler

Julia Donaldson's style is very easy to read, with many accompanied by wonderful illustrations by Axel Scheffler. We enjoy all her books but this one particularly for me as at the end the princess announces she doesn't want to be a princess after all, but a doctor. An excellent moral indeed in this era of all things pink and pincessy.

2. Forget-Me-Not by Michael Broad

A lovely tale of a little elephant, a mother's love and the importance of listening


3. When Dragons are Dreaming by James Mayhew and Lindsey Gardiner

I don't quite know what it is about this book but I love it. It tells of how the fairies are scared of dragons until one day a little dragon helps a fairy in need. A sweet, short tale, perfect for bedtime.

4. Pinkie Mouse, Where Are You? by Allison Green and Deborah Allwright

I particularly like stories which inspire traits I'd like my children to possess. This tells of a brave Pinky Mouse and a shy Pangolin playing hide and seek. Pangolin soon discovers he's braver than he thinks thanks to Pinky hiding a bit too well. A tale of friendship and breaking boundaries.

5. You Choose! by Pippa Goodhart and Nick Sharratt

We could sit with this book for hours. Wonderfully interactive, it takes you though a series of scenarios and the vibrant illustrations allow you to choose which you'd like. Children can choose where they'd like to live, what pet they'd have, what they'd do for a job amongst many other things. If your child is over about 2 years old, this is a must.

The REAL way to lose weight

I've been going a bit mad with the old exercise mags at the moment. Most of them are great (I'm looking at you, Womens Health and Ultrafit) and promote a sensible diet and give really useful advice on exercise which you can actually follow. They also use fitness models, people who granted, have little body fat but also look strong, defined and well, healthy.

At the train station this weekend I picked up a magazine with 'fitness' in the title, thinking it would be similar to the ones mentioned above. Nu-uh, skinny malinki models with bad form pictured doing the exercises and a feature on detox diets.

So people detox to 'give their body a break'. From what? Eating meat and grains, the very thing our bodies are designed to do? If you eat a healthy, balanced diet you don't need to detox. Want to know why these 'diets' work? Because they involve the consumption of very little calories. When you hardly eat, you lose weight. Who knew?

Our bodies need a minimum amount of calories to function. To keep our heart beating, organs working and brain functioning. If we don't get these calories from food, we go into 'starvation mode'. Because this energy is so important, our bodies actually cling to the fat stores (to keep as an energy reserve as it thinks it's not getting any from food) and instead burn muscle.

Let me tell you about muscle. It is active tissue and acts as a metabolic engine room. It burns calories, even at rest (unlike fat) so the more we have, the more calories we burn throughout the day. Sounds good, yes? Now, imagine what happens if you lose this muscle mass due to extreme calorie deficit? Yep, your metabolism plummets and your body actually uses less calories than before. This here is the very reason why people often put on more weight when they return to normal eating after a fad diet.

So with all these faddy diets, the only reason they work is that you're creating a massive calorie deficit. Nothing more to it I'm afraid. No science, no miracle solution.

The only way to lose fat is to burn more calories than you consume. 1lb of fat equates to 3500 calories. As a rule of thumb, you shouldn't go below 1200 calories a day to avoid 'starvation mode'. Reduce your calorie intake by 500 per day (as long as it doesn't take you below the 1200) and you could lose 1lb a week.

Better still, add in some exercise and your body will burn more calories, resulting in greater fat loss. A steady loss is advisable, no more than 2lbs a week for a sustainable loss.

Even better again is to add strength training to your regime to give your metabolism a boost so even after exercise your calorie burn will be elevated, burining more calories as you work, eat your dinner and sleep. No, you won't bulk up. Any bodybuilder will tell you how hard it is to build muscle mass, these guys work incredibly hard and nutrition plays a huge role.

So pardon my rant but the bottom line is fad diets? Don't do it. Eat sensibly, stay active and be patient and you'll get proper results which stay with you.